Misano is in the general vicinity of San Marino, so would we get a vaguely good race? Not really. It was a bit of a snooze. Let’s see how the riders fared anyway.
Top Ten Riders rated out of ten
Pecco Bananas – 10 out of 10
The young Italian must have spent the last year and a half getting all the crashes out of his system. Now that there are none left, he has produced two absolutely flawless races in a row. Says he is learning a lot from Jorge Lorenzo’s old Ducati data. Well, he wouldn’t learn much from his mentor Valentino Rossi’s old Ducati data, now would he?
Fabio Quartarararo – 9 out of 10
Claimed this was one of this best ever rides even though he only finished 2nd. He may well have been right. Fabio crossed the line 15 places ahead of the next Yamaha to maintain a big lead in the championship.
Enea Bastianini – 9 out of 10
OK, it’s a Ducati track, but this podium result was crazy. Enea isn’t even one of the young riders being mentored by Rossi. Needs to produce more results like this now.
Marc Marquez – 8 out of 10
Still continuing his gradual comeback.
Jackass Miller – 7 out of 10
Only 3rd Ducati across the line on a total Ducati track, riding a factory Ducati. Supporting his team-mate Pecco like a tail-gunner who got left back on the ground but is really rooting for the guys anyway.
Joan Mir – 8 out of 10
He’s battling valiantly on the underfunded Suzuki. However Mir’s shot at the championship is slipping away faster than the audience at a Bradley Smith Q&A.
Pol Asparagus – 7 out of 10
Decent 7th place, but still not on the pace of his one-armed team leader.
Aleix Asparagus – 7 out of 10
No spectacular result for Aleix this time out, just back to the Aprilia’s natural habitat in mid pack.
Brad Binder – 8 out of 10
The carnivorous South African overtook loads of people in the race after starting from a terrible qualifying position. A very respectable Sunday Man display.
Taka Nakagami – 6 out of 10
Unspectacular stuff.
Selected other riders
Johann Zarco – 5 out of 10
Could only manage 12th place. The former title contender shrugged so hard after the race that he now needs arm pump surgery.
Maverick Vinales – 6 out of 10
Almost side by side with Zarco across the line. After a couple of hours on the Aprilia he’s already faster than Bradley Smith was after 2 years.
Alex Marquez – 4 out of 10
Took the last point in 15th place. Seems to have forgotten how to ride the Honda again.
Danilo Petrucci – 4 out of 10
Surprised he didn’t just ride through all the gravel traps every lap as practise for doing the Dakar. Wouldn’t have finished any further back if he did.
Valentino Rossi – 5 out of 10
Could only manage 17th, but did at least overtake some people after starting 23rd. Was also the 2nd Yamaha across the line.
Franco Morbidelli – 4 out of 10
Returning from a mangled knee, but didn’t make any impression on the “grass is greener” factory Yamaha at all, finishing 18th. Must be angrier than ever.
Luca Marini – 3 out of 10
He’s only a rookie on an old bike in a small team. Just like his team-mate Bastianini who put his ancient Ducati heap on the podium. Clearly Marini doesn’t have yellow blood in his veins, and may in fact be the Kurtis Roberts of the family.
Andrea Dovizioso – 4 out of 10
A harsh return to MotoGP on the ancient satellite Yamaha to finish 21st, 42 seconds behind the winner (around the gap that Aprilia no-hoper Lorenzo Savadori usually managed). This confirms that Morbidelli was absolutely right to hate the bike.
KTM – 3 out of 10
The recent disastrous loss of pace by the KTM bikes led to fears that test rider Dani Pedrosa may have been kidnapped and adopted by Angelina Jolie. This would leave the toddler-sized Catalan unable to fulfil his duties as Angelina would keep him too busy saving the rainforests or recycling his sandals or whatever. Luckily this was proven to be wrong when Dani showed up at the post-race Misano test without having 17 adopted multi-ethnic siblings in tow.